I brought a class of IP students to a hydrophonics farm yesterday afternoon. One thing's for sure - a 15 year old IP student has at least twice as much energy as a 17 or 18 year old JC student. They are generally a vibrant bunch, talkative, playful, and more. The interesting thing is that there is quite a distinct segregation of the genders - the guys are at the trying-to-be-funny/cheeky/naughty phase, and the gals are at the I-can't-be-bothered-with-guys-argh phase. It was very entertaining to be amongst them. Weirdly enough, there was this boy who came out to me out of nowhere and asked, "Can you come teach us IP next year?" I was puzzled and asked him why, and he replied, "I think you'll be a really fun teacher." So encouraging~

Anyway, the whole trip was more interesting than I expected it to be. I received 2 free small bags of vegetables too! Hahaha... I posted a few pictures below. Yes, the 6230 camera phone strikes again!

After I touched down in school, I rushed home and out to meet an old friend Meiqi for dinner and movie. It's been a tremendously long time since we last met up like this. I think the last time we went out must have been way back in year 2 of uni. We were at PS, wanting to eat Jap food. At first I thought Ichiban sushi had closed down, because its place at B1 was boarded up. Checking the directory, we realized it's now moved to floor 6. We went up, and found that it hasn't opened yet. Apparently the relocation is very, very recent. In the end, we drifted to the Atrium, and ate at Hisatomo Family Restaurant. Now that was a bad choice. The food was really not up to standard. Frankly, it didn't taste very Jap at all; I will avoid eating there from now on. Heck, even the Sumo house at Bedok, cheapskate as it seems, serves better food for a lower price.

We caught Coach Carter at 9.35 pm. I've come to realize that if one is catching a popular enough show in PS (or any GV cinema for that matter), he can jolly well turn up 20 minutes later than the stipulated showtime. Because the advertisements last that long! Frankly, if there are that many advertisers, I don't see how they justify the upcoming price hike. Or am I paying 1 to 2 bucks more to be 'entertained' by various advertisements (especially watches). So from an estimated I-can-still-make-it-for-last-bus, the show lasted beyond midnight, by sheer virtue of long advertisements. The most amazing thing is that I actually bumped into Collin and Chris in the same cinema! I think this is the second time I bumped into them outside, but I can't remember the circumstances of the first time. Singapore is soooooo small.

I love the show! It's not spectacular in a sense, but I think it does hold some learning points for a teacher. I would definitely recommend my sports class to watch this film. Maybe they'll be inspired, and finally take their studies more seriously than their sports commitments. It's certainly one of the better shows available these days, before Kingdom of Heaven and Star Wars arrive. Here's a quote from Cruz of the basketball team, in response to Coach Carter's question 'What is your greatest fear? That you are inadequate?'

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are
powerful beyond measure. Your playing small doesn't serve the world. There's
nothing enlightening about shrinking, so that other people won't feel insecure
around you. As we let our light shine, we unconsciously give others permission
to do the same. As we are liberated from our fear, our presence automatically
liberates others."

Beautiful quote there. I'm sure I can use it for civics lesson when I finally get the chance. Actually some of the things that Coach Carter said to his team, I've said the same to my sports class, phrased in different words of course. They all resound with the same heartbeat - that you'd want the best for the students under your care.

After the movie, I met up with Collin and Chris, and we went to Mr Bean, this cafe off Paradiz, for a drink. Guess what, once again, we stayed up the whole night. We chatted till 6 am in the morning (because the midnight charge ends) and then caught cabs home. I don't think I've ever bonded with anyone in my previous cells like this before, so it's really great...although seriously tiring, especially when I was running on 4.5 hours of sleep the previous night. Argh.

First view of the place: workers packaging the vegetables.

One perspective of the farm, with some of the crops beyond the fence.

Another perspective of the farm's greenery.

A desolate view of the place; structures are empty nurseries. Love the natural colour of this pic.

Our guide for the day (in blue) explaining hydrophonics to (clueless) students.

My favourite picture of the day...perspective of the path, with a man in the distance.

Hmmm just saw an interesting thing on the news. Apparently, in the USA, a wireless card has been developed that has a range of a whopping 50 kilometres! You can access a wireless network up to that distance away. Think about it...that distance is longer than Singapore, east to west end. From a positive perspective, one tower sending signals can cater to the whole of Singapore, if it can handle the traffic. From a criminal perspective, a person can hack into and ride on the wireless network of anybody in this country.

Technology moves at a really amazing pace.

Finally pushed myself to run. Yes, run, not jog. I was so tired I had to take a nap, and by the time I woke up it was 8 plus. I have pushed jogging off for 2 days already - Tue was because the weather was really too darn hot (I can feel my sweat sizzling on my skin...ok exaggerating here, but it was hot!), and yesterday was because I forgot I had the 144 meeting. I thought that since Sun I am slowly adding distance, my weekday jogs should add speed. So I ran 1.6 km. In about 5+ min. Singapore is waaaaay too humid. It's so hard to stop perspiring, especially lately.

Tomorrow I'll do a favour for a colleague and escort some students to this hydrophonics farm in Sembawang. I hope it will be fun. I haven't been to one, but frankly, right now I would rather go visit an aerophonics farm, since that is the new technology nowadays. Hmmm, lots of changes happening, regarding travelling. My colleague and I probably will head there half a day in advance by taking an earlier flight, and go sight-seeing in Tianjin in the afternoon before officially checking in at night. I'm definitely going to see Tiananmen square and Forbidden City. Hopefully the latter won't be too costly. I'm borrowing a digital camera from Joo; no point buying one so last minute I suppose. As for the Cameron Highlands trip, right now, it looks like it's gonna become a Batam trip instead, just so that we can accomodate one precious colleague who refuses to take a coach up to Cameron Highlands in the night for fear of landslides and bus accidents.

Today, my sports class is at less than half-strength once again. Sigh. I went to class, and asked if they brought the tutorial book for the new topic and only 2 hands came up. I kind of foresaw that, so I told them they could do their own work. In any case, I'm actually safely ahead of time in terms of tutorial coverage (hehehe). In the end, I became a General Paper advisor and browsed through some of their essays which they were rushing to give some advice. Then what did I do? Hahaha, I continued one of my drawings. I was on it halfway today; somehow I managed to finish most of my work ahead of schedule and so was free...and if all goes well tomorrow, I won't need to bring work home for the long weekend too! Bwahaha. Anyway, at the end of the lesson, I suddenly earned a lot more respect...apparently, they were extremely impressed with my penwork. Hehe. Yeah lar, I purposely went in to draw to show off. I'd always told my students that I straddle science and arts; it's about time to prove it to convince them. I'll try to take a snapshot of the drawing when I'm done and post it here. Heh...

Speaking of drawings, I took a few snapshots of my little cubicle in the staff room. One of the shots show my drawings on my cupboard, all in black and white of course. One colleague who is going to get married in Jun asked me to help draw a portrait of her and her husband. I think I will do it as a wedding gift...and save myself some ang pow money! Hehehe...so cheapo hor.

The front of my cupboard...I really love my drawing of that baby...always cheers me up~

The side of my cupboard...I don't particularly like Constantine, but this was the nicest poster I could grab for free...

The not so untidy part of my desk, featuring My Sassy Girl wallpaper on my laptop~

After another day in the heat, I realized another reason I'm glad for the chance to go to China. At least it's definitely going to be cooler over there. From the current plans we are making, I think we should be going to Beijing for a day. *Shin's One Night In Beijing plays in background. So cool. I'm quite tempted to go purchase a digital camera right away! But then, it's really not a necessity. I think I should just go borrow one. It's only a 3 day trip essentially, and 1 day of recreation. How many photos can I take?

I had a minor shock this afternoon. My level head told me to combine one of my classes with another class because the tutor is away on course, and assigned me a small lecture theatre. So there I was, waiting, and then one class came in. But when I asked them which class they belong to, it turned out to be some other class. And they were distinctly told to go to this lecture theatre. I thought to myself that it doesn't really matter. Then another class came, this time, the correct one. And then another class came. Wah seh, my tutorial turned into a lecture with some 80 students. I had to change what I planned to do with my own class on the spot. Real test of adaptability.

I am the supersub civics tutor! Almost everytime someone is away from college on Wed, I have a high propensity of getting arrowed to take over a civics class. Now, I'm not unhappy about being arrowed for such duties, but the fact remains that everytime I walk in, it's very likely that's the one and only time I'll see that class. It's very temporal, and I always wonder what I'm doing there. Although I loathe admin work, sometimes, I would much rather prefer to have a civics class on my own. At least the relationship is long-term. Fortunately I'm blessed with the ability to break ice, so it has been alright so far. In fact, I think I managed to engage the class just now, which started off dead and worse still, unfamiliar with one another. And they discussed about something (boring) they are supposed to, which most other classes couldn't bring themselves to. I'll award myself a pat on the back for sheer effort.

Just came back from pastor's 144 network meeting. Today Pastor Chan Hon Sek came down to share, and I tell you, he is one pastor that can make you laugh practically throughout his message. Even though I've heard him share the same thing before, and this is, I think, the third time I'm hearing the same content, he's still funny. Now that must be anointing!

So exciting! I'm going to be sent to China! Apparently there will be some maths & science conference in this school in Tianjin which TJC has some links to, and two teachers are going over. Other than the exposure to their methods of teaching, which would be great to learn from, there's still the fact that I've never been to China before, and my colleague and I will probably extend a day's stay there to tour a little, either Beijing or Shanghai. This is such a nice blessing, because the air fare and official two day's stay are all paid for by the school. I only need to fork out money for one night hotel stay, meals for one day, and any money I spend on shopping. Never had I anticipated the possibility of being sent on any overseas trip like this in my first year here. Woohoo~

What is more amazing is that there would be a big proportion of my G12 group being in China within that time frame! J has returned to Haerbin (did I get the spelling right...?) and won't be back till late May, and my leader Adrian is bringing Collin along to China for some humanitarian project in early May. In other words, Adrian and 3 of his G12 would be in the same country, China, at some point in time. I'm really beginning to think that Adrian's calling for China will spill somewhat into his G12 eventually.

Bwahaha...so shiok!

I slept at 1.30 am last night. Partly because I was preparing remedial questions and answers for today. Once again, my students requested for the remedial although I suggested cancelling it this week. Have they finally woken up? The most fascinating thing is that the number of students who turned up is a whopping 25, which amounts to about half of both the classes I have remedial for on Tue. Seriously, I no longer know whether to be happy or not. I'm glad that they are eager, but man, it's one thing to be churning out remedials every week for them. Especially when I don't want to just pluck TYS questions to throw at them, because I reason someday they'll be practising from there.

After remedial, a few students stayed back to ask me some questions. Suddenly, one got curious and asked my age (actually I told them before long time ago liao...), and this girl went, "30?" My jaw dropped. The rest of the students couldn't believe she guessed that. And she went on to justify by saying, "I thought you are married?" Whoa, that was a great laughable moment. Her friends commented that she's so blonde today. Reminds me of the Parents-Tutor dialogue last Fri, when I was sitting there waiting for some parents, and a Student Council elect came by, saw me, and asked, "Can I help you? Which tutor are you waiting for?"

...

Goodness, I look like a parent??

After the remedial was over, I rushed down to join a colleague for a meeting with Singtel representatives. My colleague was negotiating a new and better deal for internet access actually, and because he, the man-in-charge, may be leaving as of the end of this year, has pulled me in to be his successor in certain areas. I am assuming that everything online will fall within my care eventually. The two gentlemen started presenting various other technologies available for our consideration, and I am seriously amazed at the progress of technology these days. The number of things you can do over a connection, be it internet or ethernet, is scary. 3G technology is equally impressive. I mean, we are looking at CCTVs wirelessly connected to a server which can be accessed from any computer terminal, or someone can use a 3G phone to check the images from each CCTV anywhere within the school, or heck, anywhere within the country. I also realize it is quite geek of me to even understand most of what the guys are saying, and be interested in the content! Hahaha...there's a good reason why I term myself the funkygeek.

The annual heat wave has arrived. For the past few days the heat has been unbearable. Hmmm...that doesn't quite cut it. A better description would be oppressive heat. Oppressive until I want to just hide out in an aircon place and not walk out of my staff room. Oppressive heat that is extremely torturous during lab sessions, especially since current experiments are for thermochemistry, often require heating, and therefore the fans have to be off. Argh. Oppressive till even the mood is affected somewhat, and a person can become more irritable. I mean, who wouldn't be if that person is perspiring, like, the whole time? It's a gross feeling to wake up on my bed sweaty. These are times I seriously contemplate purchasing an air-conditioner for my house...

I just came back from a jog. I can't believe how much willpower it took me to drag myself out of the house. I think I'm predisposed to be a bum. I couldn't wake up early enough to go when the sun wasn't up yet, because I slept at around 4 last night, and all through the afternoon, it was blazing hot. And then came dark storm clouds which threaten rain. When it seems like the dark clouds were posing an empty threat, I decided to drag myself out of the house, and test my Asics shoes on the hard ground of the park nearby. Anyway I went for a 3+ km jog to slowly work up my stamina. I must adhere to my plan of slowing ramping up the distance. I think I really strained my chest muscles...couldn't even hang onto the monkey bars...sharp pain. I should give myself some time to recover.

Hmmm need more sport shorts. And socks. Time for shopping again~

Finally updated my poetry page to include sample poems from 2004. After about one year of not handling my webpage, I'm really glad I took time to systematically name all the files inside my flash library, else I wouldn't be able to add on more things to it so easily.

I was doing this personality profile test (big 5) required by my school some time back, and I always have trouble answering questions pertaining to whether I am an organized person. I am uber organized when it comes to programming, coding, filenaming, folder allocation on computer, but one look at my table, and you will wonder if I'm schizophrenic. I wonder when I'll get the detailed report on my personality...

I started the day early with Lennard's wedding. Surprisingly I actually know some other guests who were there, because his bride's friends are one year my senior. Apparently, the couple have been together since JC days, which amounts to a whopping 11 years together before marriage! To me, that's a pretty powerful testimony of endurance. It was a Christian wedding actually, and I was pleasantly surprised, because I didn't know that he was one.

It was a short (and hot) event. One of my students happened to be in school and curiously walked by the tent to wave at me. She'll probably ask me about this on Tue...The pastor was very engaging, and humourous, joking about Lennard being cheapskate to have the wedding in school. Actually, he is one of the most patriotic (to school) people I know. Every year after he graduated, he still comes down to help out, so all the junior comms know him. To me, it is not a big surprise that it would be him who would want to have the wedding here. And I think the MC was right to say this event is historical. I know there had been no precedents, and I'm sure there's no one as siao-on about school as him to pull this off after. My volunteers from AVC who helped out seem to enjoy the ceremony, and didn't mind the oppressive heat. I wonder if they got ang-pow for their rendered help...

In any case, I think this is the first wedding I attended where the bride actually forgot part of the wedding vow rather than the groom. Usually it's the latter who fumbles.

I thank God so much that one of my boys SY came to church today. He had been uncontactable for 2 weeks straight, and I knew he had some family problems. His mother had rang me up a couple of times to explain the situation to me, saying that SY wanted to leave church. The strange thing is that it seems contrary to the impression I got, and I think the mother is a bit emotionally unstable lately. Anyway, when he became uncontactable, I was worried that what the mother said was true. I have been praying for the poor kid all this while. Turns out that he lost his handphone (again!). After talking to him just now, I think things are better at home for him, and I'm glad. He also doesn't seem like he wants to leave the church, and he was asking if all my boys could be baptized together in June, because 3 of them have their birthdays in that month. I'm happy~

After that, I caught up with a good old army friend of mine. We shared about many things, and he was educating me on the current performance system that the schools are using. He's actually working in MOE headquarters, and in a way, he's directly in charge of my bonus! Hahaha...so I have a direct helpdesk in him right now. I must find time to meet him up for a game or two of MtG...it's been quite a while.

Anyway, here's a picture of the solemnization. That's all my little camera phone can take from such a distance. Yes, I do want a digital camera.

Solemnization time!

Today is a looooong day, even though I have no lessons. I have never found it so hard to kill time before in school. My friday, to start with, has no tutorials, and has only 1 lecture. So I had a leisurely breakfast, hung around to chit-chat with colleagues, before I returned to my desk to finish up some work. I'm too efficient, as usual, and decided to prepare some things waaaay in advance. I'm nursing a bad sore throat, so I was quite lethargic the whole time. Almost dozed off during the lecture, which rarely happens to me. After lecture, I went to take some free nasi lemak (over-indented food for some talk, so teachers benefit!), which made up a slow lunch, and then when a couple of colleagues I promised to eat lunch with (oops!) came back, I went for a second lunch with them. Actually, I only went to get dessert. I dragged the dessert through many conversations, and returned to finish up some more work that is not due until like 3 weeks later.

After a while, I hung out at a colleague's table to watch her do a personality profile test, which all we new teachers are required to, and killed another hour. Finally I sat down to set some questions for the June Common Test. Why do I drag my time like this? All because of the Parent-Tutor Dialogue at 5.30 pm to 8.30 pm. I knew I had more than enough time to complete many, many tasks, and I also knew that my efficiency has reduced the tasks on-hand significantly over the past few days already. What a dreadfully long wait.

I had free briyani for dinner, catered for all poor tutors who have to stay back. I was scheduled to meet the parents of two of my students, so I thought I should have time to relax a bit. I was so wrong. I was summoned to the hall swiftly, and suddenly one after another I was meeting parents. In between, I sneaked out to the wedding rehearsal to speak to the groom, and apparently, he still remembers my face and post in the department committee, but not the name, which I thought was not bad already. I offered him congratulations, chit-chatted a bit, and went back to the hall to meet more parents. Apparently he works in Johnson&Johnson, marketing for sanitary napkins, pads and tampons, and I jokingly asked him if he wooed his wife with a lifetime supply of such necessities. He replied, "Only one year's supply." Haha...

I really should consider doing counselling. All the parents who came to talk to me left smiling. I am the Dispeller of Worries, Bringer of Encouragement and Herald of Hope. I managed to talk anxious parents out of their anxieties, assure them that their children are doing alright, and that they will do well at the end of the day. And I wasn't being patronizing. I do believe in all my students. All they need is a good wake-up call. Most parents commented I look young (but I am young what), which seem to imply that they were wondering about my capability, or am I being too sensitive...? Haha...I find it interesting to see the resemblance between my students and their parents. I noticed that the girls really do take after their fathers a lot. One parent mentioned something that I found very encouraging. He was sharing about the dilemma his daughter was facing. The civics tutor advised her to drop her weakest subject, which turns out to be chemistry, but she stubbornly wanted to keep the subject because she feels that I am a good teacher who is very encouraging, and she feels motivated to study under me, because she feels that under my guidance, she will do well at the end of the day. Fwah. That sure brightened up my loooong day. I feel quite assured that apparently my students do tell their parents about me, and so far, it seems to be good things. At least for those students whose parents came to see me today, which number only 9, although meeting parents of 9 students was sufficient to drain me of a full 3 hours of my time...

When it finally ended (wah I was in school for 13+ hours!), I rushed down to play pool. I think it's because I had such a looong and somewhat boring day I poured all my concentration into the game. I think I played rather well today. Consistent. Made quite a few nice shots or placed my shots accurately. Won quite a good proportion of the games. Still haven't broken my record though. One game came close, but I narrowly missed the 7th ball in a row. Argh.

I overheard my colleague mentioning the upcoming wedding in campus to one teacher, asking him if he still remembers the guy Lennard. At first, it didn't strike me when I conversed with him over email to settle the AVC stuff, but when my colleague mentioned him as Sci B department captain, I suddenly remember this siao-on guy two years my senior who came back even when he was in army to help the department for CNY float-making (I was from Sci B Dept Comm). I actually do know the fella! Hahahaha...what a small world. Think he'll be shocked to see me this Sat. I don't think he realized it's me over the emails either. So interesting~

I decided to tick off my sports class today. They came in late for class by 10 min, and I know they had lunch before my lesson. I made them stand for a while, as I questioned them why they were late. Nobody spoke up. I asked for an explanation of why they would be late, and nobody could offer any. Obviously so, since they came from lunch and not some other lesson. I like this class a lot, but they have horrible sense of punctuality. I gave them a piece of my mind, and realized I couldn't think of a suitable punishment, so I decided to just end the class 10 min late to make up for it.

After that I rushed down to sit in this practical session for the Integrated Programme (thru-train) kids. They were extracting caffeine from Red Bull. Interesting leh! Anyway, I have not seen as many breakages in one lab session as this, nor have I seen so much energy from the students. They were noisy, chatty, screamed a lot (30 girls in the class, 4 guys) whenever something went wrong, with a couple of them playing minesweeper over msn. Adorable bunch, but many spoilt brats. One of my colleagues merely told one girl to dry the bench properly and hang the rag over the tap, and she gave my colleague an angry, defiant look. The kids nowadays ah, no respect for authority. Bad, bad trend.

My RT has officially ended today with an IPPT. Still failed chin-up, but 2.4km timing is still improving, although not by much. Ah well. Have to book another IPPT attempt then. This begins the real test...of willpower! Now that there's no more RT, it's entirely up to my discipline whether I exercise or not. I must push myself to maintain the regime, else it would be for nought that I slogged. Anyway, my Asics shoes are spectacular on performance! Good purchase finally...hahaha... A whole bunch of us RT guys who became friends went for dinner, and it was fun. I conversed almost entirely in Hokkien, and I seriously believe that speaking the language of who I'm talking to breaks barriers in a way unimaginable. Maybe that would propel me to pick up some other languages...maybe.

For some strange reason, I'm actually a bit sad that it's over.

The trigger-happy budget photographer strikes again! Here are a couple of photos taken with my nokia 6230 camera phone. I think instinctively I know that the next big (as in costly) item I will purchase will likely be a digital camera...heh...

Nice sky huh? This was taken a week ago, but my bluetooth adapter was abducted, and I couldn't upload this...

Newspaper barricade! Amusing sight for me, sitting across from them. They didn't pose deliberately by the way...

I had diarrhoea the whole day. At first I thought maybe it's those unsettling butterflies in the stomach kinda thing, due to the observation perhaps, but then, I'm not the kind of person who gets stressed easily. Anyway, long after the observation ended, I was still having diarrhoea, so nope, not a psychological thing. Now, what could I have eaten wrong...?

Anyway, I was a little stoned from the weak stomach when I went to class today. I think it wasn't that visible, so that was fine. Anyway, the observation went alright I guess. I don't think I made any big errors in teaching, but I was uncomfortable with the frown on my HOD's face half the time. She had this 'huh?' look perpetually on her face, and I hope it's because the topic is alien to her who is biology-trained. My class was amazingly well-behaved today. They didn't chat as they usually do, and they dispatched one of the better students to present answers for the group work I assigned them long ago. Only one student (sheepishly) asked a query. At the end of the whole thing after my HOD left, one of the remedial students said with a big smile, "See, Mr Low, we never sabo you."

I didn't check, but at a glance, I saw tutorial books that had the questions at hand prepared already. And the student who always don't prepare her work was absent; when I asked about her, one of her good friends gave me a 'secret' look and a quirky smile, and my guess is that she didn't dare show up with an empty book. Hahaha...

Overheard in staff lounge about the casino:
"At first we were still asking yes or no, when we should be asking one or two!"
"Do you think $100 will stop locals from going? Those people who go on cruises or Genting just to gamble are willing to fork out two, three hundred just to gamble, what's a hundred bucks?"

As far as I can tell, at least in my school, the people against the casino far outweighs those for it. Maybe because many teachers are Christian? The topic and all the associated worries still crop up almost every day in the staff lounge. As another colleague said, the road to destruction is paved with good (economic) intentions.

I have an observation tomorrow! By my HOD of Science. This is supposed to be for confirmation, which determines if I stay on in TJC. (One colleague commented: "Come on lah, we are so short of chem tutors, you think the school will let you go meh?") I think I take things a bit too flippantly. I am a bit concerned over how it will be conducted, and the outcome, but I just can't bring myself to fuss over it, or do anything special in particular.

I told my class, which is being observed, about this, so that they won't be shocked when the HOD comes into the classroom. Now, just before I announced this, on my way to class, one student came to challenge me about my comment in his pupil progress report about him. He feels indignant that I said his work slipped since the beginning of this year. Talk about seeing a cup as half-empty; the first half of the comment reads as "SH is a fairly diligent student who is inquisitive and thinks further into his tutorials" which stands as a unique comment that I didn't write for any of my students. Anyway, so after I informed them about the observation, I said, "For those of you who are unhappy about my comments in your reports, this is your best chance to get rid of me" whereupon two of my remedial students gave me a wicked "heeheehee" and threatened to dig out all the toughest thermochem questions and ask me tomorrow.

...

I know they are kidding of course. I'm sure they won't do that. I'm quite lovable, right? ...right?

Anyway, this happens to be my weakest class, so I have cause to panic. But this is also the same class that showed major improvement, and surprisingly, when I told them I intend to cancel remedial this week, a few of them actually protested and requested that I carry on! Now how can I turn down requests like that? So I frantically rushed out the remedial stuff for them. If they are willing to learn, I'm more than willing to teach.

I started the day with some panic again. My AV technician is back from his reservist, and the moment I saw him, he called me into his office, and demanded explanations on why signing out was done in the wrong book (my fault, but the two different books for staff and students weren't labelled), and that there are items missing. I know I signed out all the items issued out, so that leaves me my fellow teacher-IC. He happened to walk by later, and so we checked with him. Apparently he forgot to sign out some things, but in the end, there was this follow-spot (spotlight, I think...don't even know what it is) missing. He kicked up a huge fuss about it costing 2k, and we were wondering how it could have been drawn out when only the 2 of us teachers-IC have the keys, and neither of us issued it. He was complaining about how he hates to be gone, because things surely go missing, and that sometimes we get careless. In any case, to appease him, I smsed my entire AVC exco to check with them, but to no avail.

Then an hour later, he called to apologize, saying he kept it somewhere else and forgot about it. Wah kau. Panicked for nothing. 2k item lost is big, big deal lor. Bleah.

3 pm. Casino verdict out. Obviously, it would be built. Months of the government prepping the public with the things they say. And the last straw came when MM Lee showed up to talk about the boon of setting up the casino. If that wasn't obvious on the government's intentions, I seriously don't know what is. In any case, I was praying till the unfortunate end. Sigh. A few moments ago, I was just listening to the justifications the government was making. Rationally I can picture why the government would go ahead with it. From a secular point of view, I would even think that the casino would enliven things a bit around here. But from a spiritual point of view, a casino heralds in much more evil. It is after all, still a vice, and as vices go, they come altogether.

I also realize that our government has a wonderful way of deterring citizens from doing the things they don't want them to do. Don't want too many cars on the road, tada~COE! Prevents the poor from affording cars, and earn revenue in the process! Don't want too many smokers, tada~tax cigarettes like mad! Prevents the poorer folks from buying too many (or starve trying), and earn revenue in the process! Build a casino, but don't want too many local gamblers, tada~entry fee of $100! Prevents the poor from affording to play, and earn revenue in the process! Wait...is it just me, or is there a pattern here? Rich people can do what they want, poor people suffer from tax, permits, entry fees and can't participate easily (which may be a better thing for them though), and government earns a huge chunk of revenue in the process. Wow. Can you get anything better than that?

Hmmm...Anyway, who in the right mind would pay $100 straight off to go in to (usually) lose more money, except rich folks with money to spare? Hopefully so huh? As one minister says, it's better to educate the public than to just deny them the opportunity. Let's hope that works.

I had a short remedial session with three students after my lessons ended. Well, it was supposed to be short. It was also supposed to be three students. Only two showed up initially, and one of them had to ring up the third guy to get him to come down from the gym. Apparently the third guy, SZ, totally forgot about it. SZ seldom prepares his tutorials in advance. Half the time, his assignments are late also. So he joined us, empty-handed, big silly grin on his face. Anyway, the remedial ended early, but we stayed on to chat. I started by asking SZ what he intends to do with his life. That to me is the more important question every one of my students ought to be able to answer. Surprisingly, he started to share a lot. He told me about how he's not happy being here because it's his parents who insisted. He would have gladly signed on with the national badminton team after secondary school. He told me about ambitions of taking part in nationals track and field (he's in both t&f and badminton team, which takes up his whole week in training actually), and that one day, he aspires for the olympics, and if he ends up there, he'll send me a ticket to fly me there for free. Hahaha.

I'm happy when I hear such things. I find it more disturbing when a student tells me he has no dream or ambition. I listen to his schedule, and I do understand why he hardly does his work. He really does have very little time. I still try to motivate him to work hard of course. But I did ask him when things will settle down, and he told me mid-July. I warned him I'll come breathing down his neck around that time then. Just as I was leaving, he asked me if I'm free on the last day of school to watch his badminton finals. I told him that if he invited me, I would of course try to make it. He said something that etched itself in my memory the whole of today, "Why wouldn't I invite my teacher who doesn't lose hope in me?"

Wow. That goes a long mile in making my day. :D

Today I worked extra hard at the gym. Purely vanity's sake. The reason being that my G12 brothers and I, and four of my boys, were heading down to Sentosa! Since I plan to get a tan, I need to bare my torso. Therefore, I cannot afford to look that bad right? Especially since I announced that I aspire to get back my 6-pack within this year, I must at least show some progress right? Kekeke...And today, for the first time in my 2 months of RT, we played games. It was captain's ball, except that we used the entire multi-purpose hall as the court. Lagi siong ah! A lot of ground to cover. Most of us complained that it's more draining than running the regular 2.4km.

We headed down to Sunset Bay, originally planning to play beach volleyball. However, at one glance, we could see the swarms of people there hogging the courts, and we gave up. So we found a nice spot near a soccer court (still sand of course), dumped our bags there, and set up a hammock. We started with soccer on the beach, which left me with many cuts, scrapes and bruises. It is no joke running on sand. It is even tougher to control the ball on the sand. And considering that I hardly play sports, and much less, soccer, it was a challenge. I think I didn't play too badly though. After RT, my fitness really has gone up, and I can sustain the exertion a lot better than I imagined. I don't think I'll mind investing some time in sports here and there.

After we took a break, some gangster-looking guys invaded the court. In the end, we opted out, and decided to play touch rugby instead. Equally siong, sprinting on sand. Now I know why the marines and navy divers etc train by running long distance on the sand. Actually, the weather today is excellent, thank God! The sun was out, but it wasn't blazing, so I didn't even apply sunblock. First time I played touch rugby today actually. Incidentally, first time I went on a hammock too. Yeah, yeah I know, that sounds very suaku (mountain tortoise).

We took another break, and resumed soccer when the gangster-guys left. 3 guys (strangers) asked if they could join us, so we welcomed them, and we had one more vigorous match. I sustained more injuries though. I marked one big guy who rammed me accidentally in the chest a few times. Then I tackled this guy a few times who always ended up accidentally stepping (hard) on my foot (the foot with open wounds some more!) when he tried to get past me. So now my two feet look kinda sore and sorry.

After Sentosa, we went to the hawker centre to eat dinner, and then we went to play pool! I'm amazed at how much energy I have. I like what Senior Pastor shared before about people who try to conserve energy ends up being more fatigued than other people. The more you use, the more you have indeed! But I played terribly at the start today. Not enough practice!

My feet are going to hurt like mad tomorrow when I wear leather shoes to work. Argh.

A shot of the beach, far end of Sunset Bay.

Another view of the beach (I relegated J to a little corner of the picture).

Yesterday after service, this mother of a p4 boy approached me, and asked if her boy can join my cell group. She commented that my boys are very disciplined, and she would like her son to join us, because he finds Barnabus Club (Sunday School for p4-6) too childish. Interestingly, I simultaneously felt happy and sad.

Actually, during service, at three points in time, I wanted to scold them. They were playing with their handphones, talking (albeit softly most of the time). So when the lady said they were disciplined, I kinda gave a bitter laugh. My cell leader was there, and he was quite happy. I mean, I am happy, of course; it is a good testimony after all. It's then I really started to question myself. I think as a teacher I have expectations of their discipline that may be too high. I often forget that they are just 13 years old. At that age, to be that subdued during service is already quite good, and most of them have at least caught one thing from me: dutiful note taking. I am already quite proud of them, but I still find myself expecting more.

Am I a slavedriver? I don't want to end up the kind of (spiritual) parent who keeps demanding more and more from my kids, and make them feel inadequate. I need some help here, God...

I was woken up this morning by my fellow AVC teacher. Apparently something went wrong. Now, here's the entertaining bit: a colleague approached me to ask a personal favour; her friend, an ex-TJCian, wants to get married within the school campus, and needs AVC support for the sound system. The whole thing sounds very low-budget, but it's kinda sweet, considering the groom met the bride in TJC (which makes me wonder how long they've been together already!), and wants the wedding there. So today there was supposed to be a rehearsal, but my colleague apparently forgot to request for a bypass to disable the alarms, and did not inform the Operations Manager, and so all the shutters to the second floor (where the sound system is kept) are locked. Yep, so later on, my panicky president rang me up for advice. I suggested he go borrow a portable hi-fi from any friend who stays near school to at least rehearse what songs to play and the various timings.

I don't like to wake up to emergencies. =_=

I went around Golden Mile to pick up brochures for Cameron Highlands. Some colleagues and I intend to go for a short getaway in June, and that's the place we agreed on. We originally thought of Korea, but eventually we decided that we could settle for something at about 1/4 of the cost of going to Korea. Bad point about being a teacher: only time you can go on a holiday is school holidays, where prices are much higher. See? This justifies our slightly higher pay. Hehe... Well, I've always thought of myself as a rather disorganized person (except maybe the files in my computer), but the first thing I did once I got hold of enough brochures was to open an excel file, and consolidate all the information nicely onto one spreadsheet, with the costs of staying 1, 2, and 3 nights nicely worked out. Engineering has trained me well; I love to put information in tables! Bwahaha.

After service, most of the cell group went down to Plaza Singapura. We wanted to buy some jerseys to print G12 jerseys for ourselves. It's a very unoriginal idea by now, but still it's a nice way to give identity to 12 spiritual children. We wanted to buy from World of Sports, because there is a 50% sale storewide, but there weren't any jerseys. Just as we gave up, we chanced upon Asics shop, which was offering as big a discount because that outlet was closing down. $14.50 for a jersey, albeit plain, is still dirt cheap! I decided to print my pseudonym though...kensei. Trying to be jap-o here, of course.

So there I was, in the shop, checking out the shoes. Now, there are some items that I've always wanted to get since I was younger. I think it was the consequence of being fairly poor and not being willing to blow money on expensive items. A pair of Asics shoes is one of them. I know they are extremely lightweight, and excellent for running, but I never could afford them. But I will walk into an Asics shop to check out the shoes every now and then. Another one is a pair of Levi's jeans. Somewhere in my head, I just want to own a pair. Maybe it's effective brainwashing by advertisements, or whatever, but the temptation is there. Anyway, so there I was, looking at the shoes, when I noticed something interesting. Most shoes are classified as running, trail, x-training, indoor courts, and etc, but this is the first time I saw the classification "racing". I took the shoes up and tested the weight...and they were the lightest pair of shoes I've ever seen~ Very aptly, the words on them say "Gel Feather". The price after discount was $107.40, but at that point, I knew I wanted them. Never mind that the design isn't super fantastic; these shoes are gooooood. In line with my resolutions to keep fit, lose weight, improve 2.4km timing, regain my 6-pack, etc, I figured it's worth it to invest in sporting gear.

So here they are...tada~

My brand new pair of shoes~

Today is a day of free food! Some colleagues were promoted, so they treated chicken pies for lunch. Sherry, another colleague, made agar-agar, so that became dessert. In the end, I went to get cup noodles to fill the rest of my stomach, which in the end proved unnecessary...

In the afternoon, there was the annual track-and-field meet. I think most of the members of my sports class participated in one event or another. I was signed up for this novelty race thing though, involving a team of five, stepping on two long wooden planks with ropes to move them along. Poor description, I know, but it's a little hard to describe it. But that's not the highlight of the day for me.

In recent years, there has been this cheerleading competition among the houses during track-and-field meet. I heard from my colleagues that in previous years the cheerleading is quite average. This year though, the cheerleaders performed stunts ala Bring It On. If you watched the movie, you'll know what I'm talking about. Sure, it's not near that level of acrobatics, but frankly, a good standard is there. I was very impressed. All the tossing of girls (and guys) into the air, some breakdancing, a lot of choreographed movement, human pyramids, and etc. This seems to be a new tradition, and I think it's fabulous! Too bad I don't have a good camera, else I would definitely have taken photos. I think my position as the decor captain of the department (now house) committee of Science B (now Beta house) 9 years ago still left a remnant of loyalty to the department. I find myself cheering on Beta house subconsciously. Haha, old habits die hard. I was quite disappointed when the house got second position only...

Halfway into the meet, there was a break and reception. Yes, more free food. Excellent fish balls and nice chicken wings. Apparently, many of the school's function hires this particular caterer Elsie's Kitchen. For some reason, it sounds extremely familiar, as if I've seen the name outside of TJC events, but I just can't put my finger on it. After the meet, we had a fish-n-chips night, where another caterer brought in fish and chips, and some ice cream dessert.

I only spent 1 buck on the cup noodles. Everything else I ate was free, and quite good! So blessed! Bwahahaha. Don't envy me~

The inevitable has finally happened. My spectacle screw came loose, and one lense fell out. Recently I forgot to tighten the screws on my specs, and it's really fortunate that it happened on a day when I have RT because I would bring along a pair of specs with plastic lenses. So there I was in remedial class when it happened, and my students noted that my specs were off. "Wah, cher, your eyes so small one ah?"

-_-

Haha, yeah my eyes are small. Probably comes with the 800 degrees of short-sightedness. My mum was just rubbing it in the other day on how I ignored her and sat close to the TV screen, and read lying down on the bed.

So I changed my pair of specs, and went back to class. My students seemed shocked that I was wearing tinted specs though. They were exceedingly curious why I was wearing sunglasses. Duh. It was just lightly tinted orange. So I told them the OHP light too glaring for the eyes. Bwahaha.

I had a terrible stomachache the whole day. Going to RT in that condition was a real pain. It wasn't so bad in the gym, since I could choose to do training on only my arms, but the run almost killed me. It was like having a permanent stitch on my whole abdomen. It was through sheer wilpower that I forced myself through 2 km before I gave up on the last round. I think the oyster omelette I had a couple of days back might not be very clean...sigh.

I just came back from Ps Yeang Cherng's 144 meeting. He was talking about the Vision and what it means, and I guess it's important to further anchor what has been said and done in the recent G12 conference. Something he said set me thinking for a while though. As he called out his 12 spiritual sons to stand before us, he said that looking at them, he already saw the multitudes.

Seriously speaking, I confess that I have not been viewing my boys through the eyes of faith. Somewhere in my heart I do believe that some day they will all become strong men of God. Yet looking at where they stand now, flippant as they are, young as they are, I really struggle with my expectations of them.

I don't really consider them my G12 (yet), although I view them as spiritual sons. Somehow, there is this little nagging doubt in my heart that sheds suspicion on whether they will stick with me all the way. Most of them are from Christian families, but I realize that there is only so much parents can do. In the end, it's still entirely up to them to appropriate their callings and blessings. I am trying very hard to groom them, but they aren't catching on very well. Frankly, after one year plus with them, I still can't gauge whether their heart is with God or not. True, they are only 13 years old, so they still have a long way to go, but I think there's an unreasonable part in me that hopes to see them mature and grow up rapidly, beyond their years.

I really, really pray that each of them will grow to become part of my 12. And I need big, big eyes of faith to see the multitudes from them.

The world is so unsettled these days. First the tsunamis, and the disturbing series of earthquakes in recent months. Then there's boiling conflict between China and Taiwan, and now China and Japan too. Malaysia and Indonesia are clashing over one island, which happens to sit atop an oil field of course. I am only counting recent events, and already it feels as if peace is extremely volatile. What's gonna happen next, I wonder? World War III?

Today I sat in a conversation with two colleagues. One of them is planning to buy a car, and has narrowed his choices down to two. The other colleague, apparently having more knowledge and experience in cars, was advising. Me, I was just commenting on the aesthetics of either vehicle. Experienced colleague started to extol the merits of owning a car, and driving one, and he was utterly befuddled to find me unmoved. Rare for guys to be this disinterested, he remarked. But I am really not interested. Come to think of it, looking at the girls I know, it seems to be pretty rare nowadays for girls to be disinterested too. Actually, I've been getting rides from more girls than guys. Is it because guys won't bother giving rides to guys, or that girls are nicer to me? Haha...Anyway, I told him I find it ridiculous that I have to fork out 10k+++ to throw away to the government to earn a piece of paper that entitles me to own a car. That large sum of money just to give me the rights to own a car. A sum of money that can easily buy a car somewhere else in the world.

Add to that the price of the car, and I will never see the light of day when I am debt free. A man who drives a spectacular car to which he slaves to pay may come out looking better, but is still a rat in a rat race. *squeak.

Oh my. Another tremor right now as I type this. Bad. This looks bad for Indonesia. Hopefully this one is underwater too. I'm getting kinda giiiiidddddy right now. Can't find any info on this tremor on NEA website yet...

Oh man, I just felt a tremor for half a minute as I'm typing on my computer. Is this an afterquake, or a new one? This certainly calls for intercession...dinner shall wait a bit.

I returned home to panicking neighbours. Apparently they felt giddy and were dead sure it's a tremor, so I checked the NEA website, and here it is.

The tremors felt in Singapore around 6:30 p.m. on 10 April 2005 were due to an earthquake that occurred in Southwestern Sumatra, approximately 700 km from Singapore. The magnitude of the earthquake is 7.3. The epicentre is located at Latitude 1.6S and Longitude 99.6E. An aftershock at the same location was also felt in Singapore around 7:15 p.m. The magnitude of this aftershock is 6.8.

Not again. God is relentlessly allowing the region to be shaken up, and it sure is scary. I pray that this time round, the casualty toll is not high. The region has been hit by way too many calamities.

Now my legs are really hurting. Yeah, hurting. Not aching. Four days of hopping around in worship, followed by my RT that was just over = wobbly legs. Boy, does it hurt to climb the stairs!

Before that, I was having lunch with Chris and this prebeliever, HX, also from China. We had a theological discussion, with Chris and me more or less sharing the gospel with him...in Mandarin! Bwahahaha I'm so proud of myself. I could actually sustain a long discussion like that with a PRC in Mandarin! Anyway, we failed to convince him, and my only conclusion is that he is making the same fundamental mistake I made before I became a Christian: trying to fathom God with his logical mind, when all it takes (at least for me) is one touch from God in my heart, and one tear in the eye when I saw the scene of the Crucifixion for the first time in my life. Ok lah I think I used a few words inappropriately, but hmm, I now clearly see why I'm in Adrian's 12, and why there are so many PRCs in our midst. Seems like quite a divine arrangement, if you ask me. The other day, the two PRC girls who wanted to join my AVC had commented that my Mandarin 'hen biao zhun' as they were leaving. Kekeke. Practice makes perfect.

Rewinding even further, service was great! I think the guest preacher Jack Hanes gave a solid quote to remember, "My definition of balance is going to all extremes equally." I really like that definition. It carries with it unspeakable drive and energy. I believe that the conference plus the service today is really a time of impartation. I can't measure it, but I feel that my faith has just went into a pit-stop, had a change of tyres and top-up of fuel tank, and now I'm ready to race a few more laps round the track.

Combined church service at Indoor Stadium!

Ah...what a difference a pair of sports shoes make. I walked home from Indoor Stadium in 16 minutes! That's a dramatic 6 minute reduction from wearing leather sandals. Anyway, my calf muscles are really tight now from all the dancing and hopping around...I wonder how I'm going to survive RT tomorrow.

My boys asked me why I perspire so much from the worship. The reason is the same as why my throat is now sore and my voice is hoarse, and why my calf muscles are tight. The reason is exactly what Ethan Hawke said in one scene in Gattaca, only that I apply it to many aspects of my life.

Now some movies have scenes that are extremely memorable to me. Gattacca is one of those movies, and this scene in particular: Ethan Hawke plays a man born naturally, ending up with a heart defect, and he has an elder brother born with genetic alterations to be more perfect. Early in the movie, there is a contest between both brothers (at young age) to see who can swim furthest out to sea. And Ethan's character, despite his heart condition, swam further than the brother, and in fact, saved him from drowning, and brought him back to shore. At the end of the movie, the two brothers (now adults) met again, and had the same contest, and again, the older brother lost to Ethan. Puzzled, he asked Ethan how in the world did Ethan beat him, heart condition and all. Ethan replied something I thought was profound, and it's one of my hidden philosophies since then, "It's because I didn't save anything for the way back."

I'm trying not to hold anything back in worship anymore. If I were to jump till my legs ache and my shirt is soaked with sweat, so be it. If I push myself to stay awake and complete all that I set out to do, and survive daily on 4 to 5 hours of sleep, so be it. I will just give it my all and my best. Ethan's brother couldn't swim further than him because he, in the back of his mind, calculated that he needed to conserve some strength to make it back to shore. That's the reason for his defeat. Ethan's philosophy pushes himself to his limit, and stretches himself beyond the limit, and that is how I should strive to live. How would I realize that my legs actually still can take more punishment, tiredness and all, if I had stopped jumpin' praising early from the initial aches? How would I know what I can achieve, if I do not push myself over the edge?

Interestingly, I still remember much of Senior Pastor's previous sermons. In case anyone is wondering why I didn't take notes in this conference, it's because a large part of what he shared is still on notes lying somewhere in my house, and much of it is still in my head. At least the main points. I find it strange that no one seems to notice that all that material this time round is a consolidation of many previous sermons. But today's conference was spectacular. I love the testimonies of the pastors that shared and preached. More importantly, I think God had touched us all with power and anointing. I feel energized for ministry after it all, and I guess the most important part of the conference every year for me has never really been what is shared, but rather what is imparted in all the altar calls. I'm after the anointing from the pastors' prayers especially. It's been such a long weekend of conferences, but man, do I feel good!

Day 2: High view of the stadium and the crowd...

Day3: Watching the multitudes get prayed over...

Day 3: trying to move to the floor to receive prayer...

The Lord has really blessed me with a lot of energy and efficiency. Now because of my RT session clashing with yesterday's conference session, I scheduled it on the Wed just past. So Tue and Wed I went for RT, and yesterday evening, conference till 11 pm. Today I went to the conference at about 4, and tomorrow whole day will be at Indoor Stadium for the last day of the conference. Sunday I'll be having combined service in the morning, and after lunch I will rush down to RT again. Essentially I have no weekend left, so I decided I have to finish all the work on my hands before I left school today.

I am truly an efficient man. Haha. By Thu, I've finished all the work I need to do, and today, I went on to complete some work in advance. Right before I left, I finished the model answers for the topic to be covered maybe two weeks later. Note that it's not my duty to do the model answers. I just like the idea of having everything on softcopy for posterity's sake, so I take it upon myself to do some extra work, and email my relieved colleagues the fruits of my labour. This is my attempt at being the light of the world, and salt of the earth. Practical blessings work best as testimony, don't they?

Today there was a miracle! I think the G12 conference really brought with it blessings. Right now, the AVC I am in charge of is facing a crisis. The year 1 students I have in the club number only 3, including 1 repeat student. There's still 1 more through-train student, so I have at most 4 members. To do the duties scheduled for the whole school. (It just had to happen right when I took over. I will survive~) Today, out of nowhere, there was these two PRC scholars who rang me up and said they want to join the club. I hope they aren't the exchange students, else they'll be around for only 1 more term. Argh. Anyway, that in itself is quite a miracle already. My colleagues were saying I look happy, as if I struck 4D or Toto. That's simply because nobody wanted to join the club! The best part is, I was telling a colleague about the new additions to my club, and she told me she has two students who mentioned they were interested in joining the club too! Wah! God is good to me~

While I was at the conference later in the day, one of my boy's dad bought chicken rice for us for dinner, free of charge! It's not the cost savings that is important; it's because now that LeisureDrome is closed for renovations, there is no food in the near vicinity except some really expensive restaurants, so having the chicken rice saves us a lot of time and trouble venturing far and away. Then an aunt of one of my boys bought some potato chips for us, and affirmed me that I've been doing a good job with them. God sure knows how to bring a smile to my face. So blessed, I can't contain it~

I realized that all that Senior Pastor taught in this conference, he recently had preached, and the points still are clearly in my head, more or less. So I wasn't paying full attention during the preaching, and decided to save my energy for other stuff - praise and worship! Prayer! Receiving anointing and blessing! And later in the night, I was just trying hard to decipher Espanol (Spanish) which some speakers spoke in, with English translations for us, of course.

Tonight I decided I will not waste time on the free transport, or squeeze with fellow churchmates on already crowded SBS buses, so I walked home from Indoor Stadium. At my brisk pace, it still took me 22 minutes to reach home. Not bad lah. It would have taken longer by other means of transport actually. And I feel healthier and fitter!

I am pleasantly surprised today. I just finished marking the lecture tests of all 3 of my classes, and found that there's a general improvement in the number of passes, the quality of passes and the top scores. But that's not the pleasant surprise - most of my remedial students did very well, to the extent of outperforming their (eh for lack of better word) elite classmates! Bwahahaha I'm so proud of them all. I see their effort, and I see it paying off. Tremendously satisfying and encouraging. Partly it relieves my worry too, because my tutorials move fast compared to other tutors, and I was wondering whether they did catch everything. Seems alright thus far...

After my long day at school, I rushed down to the G12 conference. I must remember to top up my water bottle before I go, because when you are out of water there, there is nowhere to refill, and if you buy a drink, you get something that doesn't taste nice, is of small quantity, and not worth the hefty price tag. A silly episode that happened: Sophia messaged me to say she saw me, so I replied her asking where she was. So she described to me her position, and I checked, and it seemed to be the row directly in front of me. Now I was sitting in the left-most seat, so I looked across the row in front, checking all the faces, but I didn't see her. Then I realized she was sitting directly in front of me.

... So duh right?

Anyway, I was fighting hard to stay awake throughout the conference. It's the lethargy that comes with flu haunting me. So when the pastor gave an invitation for healing, I quickly went down. Yesterday I was just talking to a friend about my coming down with flu, and when she asked me if I can still go to the conference, I said that I will go because I will be healed. I would like to think I was prophetic, but it was more of a joking claim.

In any case, near the stage in the Indoor Stadium, I felt the intense presence of the Lord. More specifically the Holy Spirit. I don't really know how to describe the feeling, but it's like there's this area where I felt that the air was denser, heavier, or thicker. It's a feeling of air that actually weighed down on my skin a little bit, and then I felt it pass towards my right. Whoa...awesome. In any case, I felt something being extracted out of my body, and I will presume it is the flu virus, and I became wide awake. No more lethargy, and I could dance all through the concluding praise songs.

The ironic thing though is that while I felt healed by God, and so it feels like the flu has gone, I now feel an impending sore throat from the cheering and shouting in the conference...

My AV technician just left for reservist. My goodness. I didn't realize how many things he does in the background. Now that he is gone, it feels like my day essentially doubles, considering I have to cover some of the important things on his behalf. Sheesh. My AVC teacher-in-charge title really comes nicely packaged with a whole lot of sh*t. Now that the current IT Comm most-IT-savvy dude is also planning on transferring to HQ, I am slowly being prepared to take over more duties.

These days, some teachers who I'm not familiar with, will spot me in the staff lounge or around the school, and say, "You're Kian Seh right? You're in charge of AVC?" Which is usually a rhetorical question, because they actually already are looking for me to request to draw out something or request for AV services. Good thing reservist stuff happens only once a year usually. The next 8 working days will be devastating.

I have been monitoring my weaker students for a long time, and for many of them, I noticed that they have been more regular with their tutorials and assignments. I always do routine rounds about the classroom, checking on whether each student has prepared their work in advance, and many of them always flash empty books and toothy grins at me. Nowadays, the students whom I have recognized to usually turn up empty-handed would see me coming round, flip the pages triumphantly and exclaim in protest to my doubting look, "See? I got do ok!"

You really can't imagine how happy that makes me feel. Moments like this make all the crap that comes down seem much less significant.

Today, my lowest-scoring student came up to me, and asked me Ten-Year Series (TYS)questions that she answered wrongly and didn't understand. TYS! I mean, here was a student who last year did not even attempt her tutorials; this year, she has been trying very hard to prepare her work in advance, and now she's even doing TYS? I tell you, at that point in time, it felt like I was looking at a bud starting to blossom into a flower, or a fledgling eagle trying to spread its wings for the first time - all that raw potential unravelling before my eyes. That kind of feeling is indescribable. The beaming pride of a parent perhaps? Or exhilarating satisfaction? Somewhere along that line.

In case it's still not obvious, yes, I love my job.

I called this particular organization (that I shan't name) to check certain information for my school, and this helpful guy entertained all my queries. Later on, when he couldn't find some of the details, I left him my email address and name. So out of courtesy, he responded, in his perfectly masculine voice, "Hi, my name is Caroline. I will email you shortly."

...

I was walking to the bus stop when I had this sinking feeling that I'm gonna miss the bus, even though I was on time. I decided to trust my gut instinct, and sped up. But when I came out of the underpass, I saw bus 12 at the bus stop already. I sprinted with all my might, got very near the bus stop and the bus driver actually saw me, before he turned his head away and drove off. That was 6.42 am. I told myself, it's no point getting upset over a stupid thing, because the next bus should arrive at 6.50 to 6.55 am.

So I sat down, and waited. And waited. And waited. I waited till 7.05 am before I decided it was pointless, and walked some metres down the road to wait for a cab. I had waited 23 min for a [expletive] SBS bus! So much for the 10 min interval they claimed. And I waited. At 7.09 am bus 12 came. That's a whopping 27 minutes! [expletive] [expletive] By then it was too late to take a bus.

And there were no cabs! Until 7.17 am. I tell you, at that point, give me a barrel of gasoline and I'll raze down any place that belongs to SBS. I can wait for friends for a long, long time. But I do not extend the same grace to public transport. Especially if they exceed their claims by more than double. If there's one thing that pisses me off, it's waiting for buses beyond 15 min. That's the limit to my patience.

And I had to get a grouchy taxi-driver. Arrrrrrrgh.

I finally came down hard on my boys today during cell group time. They have not been doing their quiet time for a long while, but the main thing is that they were pretty flippant about it. At that point in time, I decided I had to spell it out to them what I thought of their actions and attitude. What a struggle it was! No wonder the pastors say fathering is not easy, especially when it comes down to discipline. There was this part of me that worried about how they would take it, but in the end, I recognized that after all, they are God's children, and He will take care of them; I only need to do what is right. I can only pray it made some difference.

I met my ex at the hawker centre after service. She's still as pretty as I remember. We talked a bit, but I felt awkward. I actually felt better being quiet than speaking, and it is rare for a social creature such as myself. At some point, the unsociable she had to make conversation. My heart still ached when I saw her again, and I finally understood why today. It was not anger or sadness; it was not remnant affection haunting me either. It was merely intense regret, the sort that is spelled as 'what could have been'. What flashed past my mind as I stood there momentarily unable to speak was recollection of the reasons we broke up, and brimming in my throat were some things I wanted to tell her but didn't - that if we had hung on, things could have been so much different now. I am different now. Some of the things she couldn't live with have changed, by circumstance, working life, and otherwise. But there seems to be no turning back anymore anyway.

After some changes in plans, Collin, Chris, J and me went down to Holland Village for a drink. First time I went to Wala Wala actually. Originally, Steph had asked me to go there with her and some mutual friends, but I wasn't feeling well, and there's still RT tomorrow (as of right now, later). Since my cell guys wanted to head there anyway, and that they seemed game to hang out with my friends who they haven't met before, we all hung out together. It turned out pretty good actually. I had fun, and I think there wasn't much problem having people not having previously knowing one another hanging out. I had meant to head home earlier, but due to some misinformation, I missed the last bus, and I came back to Wala Wala from the bus stop after a futile wait. So much for coming back earlier. We ended the night with supper at NYDC, which was certainly delicious. Argh. Sick + drink liquor + eat heavy supper = not good for RT. But come to think of it, my throat actually felt better after the liquor. Maybe alcohol killed the germs! Haha...

As we were heading back, one friend (Elaine) asked me how long it took my cell guys to bond so well, and suddenly I realize how far we have come. Again, I remember the old cell which we almost wanted to close down, and the sudden breath of new life that formed the current cell. Just that thought alone makes me grateful and thankful to God for the resurrection of something that more or less died once. Amazing grace indeed.

Argh. Once again, I'm sleeping 3 hrs before RT. With liquor in my system furthermore! I'd better recover by tonight...

I wore my new pink polo-T to school today. Strangely, I received many comments about it being cheerful, colourful, nice, etc, but the best one goes to my HOD. She saw the white and pink colour, with brown horizontal stripes, and she went, "Somehow you remind me of this particular ice-cream..."

"Neapolitan," I replied her, because at that moment I realized that my shirt does look like a tier of vanilla over a tier of strawberry ice cream with stripes of chocolate. On a positive note, I guess I looked delicious. Heh. Anyway that polo-T belongs to the 200 buck expenditure on Wed. I bought 2 sports singlets also from Adidas and New Balance, hoping that the hefty price will spur me to exercise more and make full use of them, 1 shoe bag, and had dinner at Crystal Jade.

I had intended to leave the school early, but somehow, things just cropped up. The most ridiculous part was going around the school, with two of my students helping to carry a big ladder, attempting to fix the student EZlink card readers. When they asked me, "Wah, teacher also must do this kind of thing ah?" I seriously sian diao...yes, teaching does include silly admin work, and stuff like this.

I originally wanted to go home and sleep, but somehow I just didn't want to spend a Friday night concussed in bed. So I messaged a friend Sophia over msn, and she happened to be free to watch a movie with me. The said movie is Spanglish, which is a pretty good show. It is a dramedy (drama + comedy), with quirky humour throughout and nothing really slapstick. But quite a few parts were seriously touching. Lots of sincere characters in the movie with messed-up lives, and one can easily identify with them. Definitely worth a watch, considering the competition in the cinemas consists of shows such as The Eye10, Son of the Mask, and other crappy movies.

After that, we went for dinner at Suki Sushi. I ordered a sashimi plate in fear and trembling; somehow, I had the impression that the food probably won't be that good, since it seems to be owned by the same company that owns Kbox and K-pool. The food was not bad, surprisingly, although I would still wanna go to Ikoi restaurant again some other time.

We ended the night with a pool session, which was quite enjoyable. She's a rather good player, and is pretty accurate. One more person to add to my pool-kaki list! And now here I am, still running on an average of 4 hours of sleep per day for the whole of this week, nursing a sore throat. Things look bad. I think I will just keep gulping water down till I burst at the seams.